and the impact it has

When you experience broken promises from a friend or family member it can stir up feelings of disappointment, frustration, and betrayal. It can create a loss of respect and erode relationships.

When you don’t keep a promise to someone it communicates to that person that you don’t value him/her. You have chosen to put something else ahead of that commitment. Even when you break small promises, others learn to be more hesitant to count on you.

Imagine what not keeping promises to yourself does…the impact remains the same.  In addition, it can ultimately harm your self-image and self-esteem and your life in general.

On the contrary, keeping promises to yourself can create self-trust.  Self-trust can create a deeper self-love.

When making promises (to yourself), think about:

• What is your motivation behind it?
• Is the promise realistic?

Your motivation can be your “why” that you turn to each time you think about keeping or breaking the promise.  Do a self-assessment on what you really want and what needs to change or what you need to continue.

Staying realistic when making the promise will help you keep the promise you make. Even the tiniest of promises are valuable to your health and well-being.  In fact, sometimes you discover that even tiny promises leave the biggest impact.

It is also important to keep stress levels, anxiety, and feelings of overwhelm down when making promises to yourself, as you are more likely to break promises under such a state of mind.  Revisit a few of my recent Blog Posts on overthinking and overwhelm for helpful tips on keeping these in check.

All of this takes discipline.  It can be hard.  You are worth it, and you can do hard things! Being your own biggest ally will be key.  As you would want to keep a promise to your most valued loved ones because you don’t want to break those relationships, do the same to nourish your own level of trust, respect, and kindness (to yourself).

Tiny promises to keep in mind as options (be specific to help you stay on track):

• I will get 30-minutes of daily exercise
• I will spend time with myself (set a length of time and maybe time of day time – i.e. I will sit quietly with myself for at least 1-minute each morning)
• I will read one Bible verse daily
• I will spend time with people I love (i.e. I will have one meal/month with my closest friend, grandfather, mother, etc.)
• I will be decisive (i.e. the next time I am presented with a choice, I will make one confidently and stick to it)
• I will be confident in my own ability to make decisions (along with above)
• I will take at least one risk/month
• I will challenge my own negative thinking (i.e. the next time I find myself being negative, I will think of at least one thing I am grateful for in relation to that thought)
• I will listen to myself (i.e. when I have a “gut feeling” I will trust it and act upon it)
• I will pay attention to my emotions (the real emotions – i.e. when acting angry what is the underlying emotion…am I really hurt, sad, tired??  Notice. Pay attention. Respond accordingly)
• I will build positive relationships (and start setting healthier boundaries for those that may not be) i.e. I will reach out to someone who helps bring out the best in me; someone I admire, respect, and/or value; someone who inspires me at least 1x/week and spend some time with them on the phone or in-person. On the contrary, if someone I know is not a good influence on me reaches out, I will keep my healthy boundary (saying “no”, keeping them at “arm’s length, etc.)
• I will enforce personal boundaries (along with above)
• I will only charge on my credit card what I know I can pay off each month or I will only purchase each month what I know I am able to pay for without using a credit card
• I will invest $100/month
• I will practice meditation or at least one mindfulness exercise each day (even if it is only for 60-seconds a day)
• I will express my needs

There is a saying “promises are the unique human way of ordering the future, making it predictable and reliable to the extent that is humanly possible…”  It is known you can’t actually predict the future, but you can make choices (and promises) to give yourself the best opportunities possible (and put yourself in the situations) to make (and live) a life of well-being, joy, love, confidence … one day, one minute at a time. 

Each week we try to correlate these Blog Posts with our weekly newsletter.  If you haven’t yet, enter your first name, email and click “yes, please” in the black box within the main Blog Page of this website to have these drop into your inbox weekly. In each you will also get a helpful Mindful Minute – this week, “Physical Body Sensations”.

For additional tips on mindful living and topics like this, follow me @livinghealthyin5fields on social media.