…or Just the Next Thing You’re Figuring Out

Life is a journey, full of ups and downs. While moments of joy and success can uplift your spirits, the difficult times can truly test your resilience and shape your character. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, financial struggles, health issues, or personal failures, challenges are an inevitable part of the human experience. In these moments, it may feel like the weight of the world is too heavy to bear. However, it is often in these times that you discover your true strength and ability to persevere.

In fact, there is a saying “there is not really a difficult thing, unless you decide it’s a difficult thing. Otherwise, it’s just the ‘next thing’ you’re figuring out.”

These “next things” can come in many forms – sudden and unexpected, like a natural disaster or an accident, or gradual, like chronic illness or long-term financial difficulty. They can leave you feeling helpless, lost, or even hopeless. However, what often distinguishes these experiences is that they challenge you to confront your vulnerabilities, reflect on what truly matters, and adapt to new circumstances. While the struggle may feel all-encompassing, it can also provide an opportunity for growth, both personally and in your relationships with others.

These times often provoke a range of psychological responses and can initially bring shock, denial, or disbelief; perhaps followed by anger or frustration. Contrarily, you can choose acceptance, where you can begin to heal and adapt.

The journey through “next things” is rarely linear. There may be setbacks, healing and growth may take time, and there’s no “right” or “wrong” way to cope with it all.

Here are some ways to navigate through “next things” and come out stronger:

• Embrace Vulnerability – it’s easy to feel the need to put on a brave face during tough times, but pretending to be okay can hinder emotional healing. Allowing yourself to feel the full spectrum of emotions, including sadness, fear, or grief, is essential for processing the experience. Vulnerability, while uncomfortable, can be a powerful tool for growth and connection.
• Seek Support – difficult times don’t have to be faced alone. Reaching out to family, friends, or support groups can provide comfort, perspective, and strength. Sometimes, simply knowing that others care and are willing to listen can help you feel less isolated. Professional therapy or counseling can also be a helpful resource for navigating emotional challenges.
• Focus on What You Can Control – in situations where much feels beyond your control, focusing on small, manageable aspects of life can provide a sense of direction. Whether it’s sticking to a routine, making healthy choices, or setting achievable goals, taking small steps toward self-care and progress can be empowering.
• Find Meaning in the Struggle – while it’s difficult to see the benefit in these situations while you’re going through them, looking for meaning in the experiences can offer a sense of purpose. You can find strength in the idea that difficult times build resilience and help you appreciate the good moments in life, while finding new perspectives and insights through these struggles.
• Practice Patience and Self-Compassion – healing doesn’t happen overnight. Be patient with yourself as you process your emotions and adjust to new realities. It’s important to practice self-compassion, acknowledging that it’s okay not to be okay all the time. Showing yourself kindness during difficult moments can help alleviate feelings of guilt or shame. Time allows for reflection, healing, and growth, while also allowing you to appreciate the lessons learned or the strength discovered through the experience.
• Cultivate Hope – hope can be a powerful force in overcoming adversity. Even when the future seems uncertain, holding onto the belief that things can get better and that you have a choice, or that you will emerge from the situation stronger, can provide the mental and emotional strength needed to keep going. Sometimes, hope is found in the smallest of moments – a kind word from a stranger, a moment of peace in nature, or a small achievement.
• Build Resilience – resilience is the ability to bounce back and adapt. It’s not about avoiding pain or difficulty but about responding to it in a way that enables growth. Resilient people don’t shy away from challenges; they face them head-on and find ways to recover, learn, and evolve. Resilience isn’t a fixed trait; it’s something that can be nurtured and developed through practice. It’s built by confronting difficult situations, taking care of your mental and physical well-being, and finding meaning in the hardship. The more you develop your capacity to handle stress and setbacks, the more resilient you will become.

“Next things” are inevitable in life. While they can test your endurance, they also provide you with an opportunity to discover your inner strength, build resilience, and find meaning in your struggles. You don’t always have control over what happens to you, but you do have control over how you respond to challenges.

When you find yourself amid a “next thing”, know that you are not alone. Reach out for support, take it one day at a time, and remember that growth often arises from the most painful experiences. You are capable of more than you know. In its wake, you may find yourself more resilient, more compassionate, and more connected to the deeper parts of who you are.

Ultimately, these things don’t define you – they shape you. And how you navigate them is a testament to the strength of the human spirit.

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